If today is my last day

I have never been anyone’s first choice but it’s okay. I understand them, really. If i would be given a chance, i wouldn’t even choose myself either. I feel like my body is trapped from social conformation jail that doesn’t even have a lock. The door is just open but i’m too scared to stand up and head out. That’s the problem, i’m always scared of everything.  I feel like a slave to everything i don’t want to be. It’s ironic how happy and amusing i sound when i  encounter other sad people. I talk to them like the most experienced adult because i know how it feels like when no one else is there to hear what you had to say.

The problem is i supress everything, the positive or negative. I don’t know what to show. Because i don’t even have anything to. If today’s my last day, then it would be the happiest day of my life. Not that i have alot of moments like that.

To anyone reading this: Everyone you meet is battling a war that you have no idea, and not every one is capable of talking it out. So be kind. You’re simple smile would mean a lot.

//and if today wont be my last, i won’t be here tomorrow. I feel like my head is going to explode. i’ll be having an eye check up. //

Your Ally,